A man strolls over to a woman in a crowded bar. He leans his head forward. Smiles. Then he asks, "Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?"
The woman reports no injuries. The man, on the other hand, leaves the exchange with a bruised ego.
Why dont women like these pick-up lines? Why do they shirk from men who produce recycled phrases?
Its because these lines usually come off stiff or, worse case scenario, downright creepy. Theyre not a good way to pick up women.
There are some things you can say to women that work, though. And theyre probably not what youd expect.
Hi, Im __________. Whats your name?
I know, it seems too easy, doesnt it? No poetry. No allusions to angels. No choirs.
Turns out, the understatement is better than fine. If youre approaching a woman out of the blue, especially in a place like a bar, she can guess your motivations. By keeping the introduction simple and neutral -- in other words, not over-the-top romantic -- it makes the initial exchange low key.
And if she isnt down to talk? No problem. Your casual approach makes it even easier to casually move on.
Make a positive comment about your surroundings.
Youre at a movie, an art gallery, or a concert. You see a woman who catches your eye.
When youre close enough, make an off-hand comment about something youre both observing. Keep it upbeat so that her initial impression of you is positive. In some settings this works better than others -- few people want their ear talked off at a movie -- but its almost always a good way to break the ice with someone.
If theyre receptive to you, expect for them to give you an opportunity to hang out more. So, they may linger once the movie is over. Or you may notice them crossing your path during the show more regularly that coincidence usually dictates. And if it comes with occasional eye contact? Congrats, youre in.
Compliment her.
No, I dont mean you should take the opportunity to tell her that youre sure the stars fell from the heavens to collect in her beautiful eyes. Even if you believe that, keep that mum for a while.
Instead, focus on a unique accessory, garment, or something else shes carrying, like a book. Its something she hand selected, so its an extension of who she is more than what she looks like. Compliments about that stuff tend to go better in the early stages of dating. Theyre nice to hear, but theyre not too forward, either.
One last thing:
More important than what you say is how you say it. If you approach someone confidently, giving off the impression the conversation is a low-pressure, no-big-deal exchange, the woman will probably take it the same way. It will help lower her guard, making it easier to get to the next stage: securing a date.
