When we are faced with a difficult relationship or a challenging situation in a relationship, in almost all cases, were not in the least bit grateful for the other person. Instead, were busy blaming the other person for the problems we have with them, and that means we dont have a shred of gratitude. Blame is never going to make a relationship better, and its never going to make your life better. In fact, the more you blame, the worse the relationship gets, and the worse your life gets.
Whether its a current relationship or a past relationship, if you harbor bad feelings toward another person, practicing gratitude will eliminate those feelings. Why would you want to remove your bad feelings about another person?
"Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned."
Gautama Buddha (Circa 563 BC - 483 BC)
Founder of Buddhism
Bad feelings about another person burn your life, but gratitude will eliminate them!
For example, if you have an ex-partner who is connected to you through your children, and the relationship isnt good, look at your childrens faces and realize that they wouldnt be alive if it wasnt for your ex-partner. Your childrens lives are one of the most precious gifts you have. Look at your children, and give thanks to your ex-partner for their lives every single day! As well as bringing peace and harmony to the relationship, through your example you will be teaching your children the greatest tool for their life - gratitude.
Or, if youre suffering from a broken heart or grief due to a relationship having ended, you can use gratitudes magical power to transform your pain. Gratitude magically transforms emotional pain into healing and happiness faster than anything else, and the story of my parents is a perfect example of that.
My mother and father fell in love with each other virtually at first sight. From the moment they met, they were truly grateful to be with each other, and they had the most beautiful marriage I have ever seen.
When my father died, my mother understandably suffered from enormous grief. After months of suffering, she began to use gratitudes magical power, and despite her immense grief and pain, she looked for things to be grateful for in the future. One by one she found them. She found or remembered things she had always wanted to do but didnt have time to do when my father was alive. And with this courageous step of gratitude, opportunities to fulfill her dreams magically poured in, and her life became rich with happiness again. The magical power of gratitude gave my mother a new life.
For todays magical practice you are going to look for a hot coal that is burning your life, and literally turn it into gold through gratitude! Choose one difficult, problematic, or broken relationship that you want to improve. It doesnt matter whether the person is currently in your life, or if its a past relationship and the person is no longer in your life.
Sit down and make a written list of ten things youre grateful for about the person youve chosen. Think back through the history of the relationship, and list the great things about the person or the great things you received from the relationship. The easiest way to do this is to think back to the way things were before the relationship deteriorated or ended. If the relationship was never good, then think hard about any good qualities in the person because they are there.
This magical practice is not about who is right or wrong. No matter what you feel someone has done to you, no matter what someone said or didnt do, you can magically heal the relationship, and you dont need the other person in order to heal it.
There is gold in every relationship, even the difficult ones, and to bring riches to all your relationships and your life, you have to find the gold. As you dig and discover a nugget of gold, write it down, address the person by name, and express your sentence in gratitude:
Name , Im grateful for what? .
1. Paul, Im grateful, for our time together. While our marriage did end, I learned a lot, I am so much wiser today, and I use what I learned from our marriage in many of my relationships today.
2. Paul, Im grateful for everything you did to try and make our marriage work, because ten years of marriage means you did try.
3. Paul, I am grateful to you for our children. The joy I receive from them every day could not be without you.
4. Paul, Im grateful to you for the hard work and long hours you put in to support our family, while I was at home taking care of our children. It was a big responsibility to ave all of us dependent on you, so thank you.
5. Paul, I am grateful to you for the precious moments I had with our children as they grew up. I got to see our children talk and walk for the first time, and I know you didnt have that opportunity.
6. Paul, Im grateful for your support when I went through a difficult time of grief or loss.
7. Paul, Im grateful to you for the times when I was sick, and you did your best to take care of me and my children.
8. Paul, Im grateful for the great times we had, and we did have money.
9. Paul, Im grateful that you want to continue to be a father to our children.
10. Paul, Im grateful for your support and the time you want to give to our children. I know they mean a much to you as they do to me.
By the time youve finished your gratitude list of ten things, you should feel much better about the person and the relationship. The ultimate point you want to reach is where you dont have any bad feelings towards the person anymore because its your life that is harmed by those feelings. Every relationship is different, and if need be, you may choose to repeat this magical practice over several days until you reach the point where you dont have any bad feelings towards the person anymore.
If you are using gratitudes magical power to improve a current relationship, you will see the relationship begin to change miraculously before your eyes. It only takes one person to magically change a relationship through gratitude, but it is the person who uses gratitude who receives the benefits in their whole life.
If you chose a past relationship, where you are not in contact with the person anymore, you will feel a peace and happiness fill you, and at the same time you will see other current relationships in your life magically improve.
In the future, if a relationship becomes challenging, remember to use this magical practice immediately. You will stop the difficulties before they get any bigger, and instead you will increase the magic in the relationship!
Magic Practice Number 15
Magically Heal Your Relationships
1. Count Your Blessings: Make a list of ten blessings. Write why youre grateful. Reread your list, and at the end of each blessing say thank you, thank you, thank you, and feel as grateful for that blessing as you can.
2. Choose one difficult, problematic, or broken relationship that you want to improve.
3. Sit down and make a written list of ten things youre grateful for about the person youve chosen. Write it down in the following way:
Name , Im grateful for what? .
4. Just before you go to sleep tonight, hold your Magic Rock in one hand, and say the magic words, thank you, for the best thing that happened during the day.
